The sequel to the micro-budget trash slasher 'Winnie-the-Pooh: Blood and Honey' is being released, whose author we advised last year to go to film school. He seems to have taken steps in that direction. Whether it benefited his business of mocking ot...

Christopher Robin goes to a psychotherapist. That's probably not surprising for someone who spent his entire childhood talking to a talking bear. And a talking owl. And a tiger. And even, dare I say, a pig. It would be much more surprising if he didn't go to a psychotherapist. What adds a piquant touch to the situation is that his talking childhood friends are maniacal cannibals who grew up with the boy, having lost, frankly, a significant share of their charm.

When Christopher returned to the Hundred Acre Wood, hoping to introduce his girlfriend to his dear friends (she thought they were imaginary), they did not show their best side. The girl died, farmers died, random partygoers died. Piglet (no one dared to call him Piglet anymore) was particularly effective in wiping out the local population, wielding a sledgehammer. True, Christopher Robin was blamed for everything—the residents of his hometown repeated his girlfriend's mistake and did not believe that giant killer mascots lived in the forest. Can these distrustful people be understood? Will they pay for their skepticism in the second film? Yes and yes.

Ivan Kilyakov

Where We Came with Piglet: Review of the Trash Horror 'Winnie-the-Pooh: Blood and Honey'

The film 'Winnie-the-Pooh: Blood and Honey' has been released, a micro-budget curiosity – a trash slasher with characters from Alan Milne's books, which desperately makes you want to sleep and after which sleeping becomes...

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'Winnie-the-Pooh: Blood and Honey' was a terribly cheap, laughably bad, and idiotic film where no one even thought to set up proper lighting. There is, of course, a version that director Rhys Frake-Waterfield simply wasn't devoid of pity for the audience and didn't want to torture us with the sight of Winnie and Piglet in daylight, but a man who decided to create a whole cinematic universe with twisted versions of children's fairy tale characters can hardly be suspected of such humanism. The second part, alas, confirms that he cannot be suspected of good taste either.

In retrospect, it's clear that 'Winnie-the-Pooh: Blood and Honey' is an extended version of Winnie-the-Pooh's famous song. The heroes have sawdust in their heads, and the entire runtime is filled with hums, puffs, screams, and yells. Frake-Waterfield's only serious innovation is axes and sledgehammers in their hands. And despite the first part being quite monstrous, it is remembered with warmth: it's a classic slasher, cheap and bad, but unserious enough that criticizing it seems like a strange idea.

For the production of the second part, Frake-Waterfield, alas, got more money and decided, accordingly, to earn even more. Instead of sawdust, now there are piggy banks, and the joke turned into a good investment project. That would be fine, but the director of films like 'Killer Christmas Tree' and 'Easter Slaughter' felt directorial talents in himself and added pop psychology and the idea of processing trauma to the great formula (sawdust, screams, axes). Many liked it, but overall, it seems like a crazy and meaningless vulgarization of the theme. 'Winnie-the-Pooh: Blood and Honey 2' became more serious, and as a result, more stupid. In its worst moments, this movie turns into an even more boring and pathetic version of 'Five Nights at Freddy's', which, as we know, was the worst film of 2023.

Christopher Robin tries to save his sister, remembers his childhood, walks around with a sad face, can't even properly hit on his girlfriend, and about forty minutes of the total runtime are somehow devoted to this. But in the other moments—when the director returns to his native territory of trash—the movie blossoms.

Owl delivers hilarious monologues about ressentiment and how the animals will take revenge. Winnie-the-Pooh listens to him with a regal air and picks up an axe. Tigger goes so wild in the club that seemingly no one is left alive. Closer to the finale, Winnie-the-Pooh parodies Darth Vader's famous walk, and Owl parodies the vampire's flight from 'Underworld 2'. Only Piglet didn't stand out, but the sledgehammer is no longer the hit of the season. It's all stupid, fun, and absurd enough, and overall, out of all the bad ways to spend an evening, this one is not the worst. And even in some sense, the right one.

Ultimately, 'Winnie-the-Pooh: Blood and Honey 2', like the first part, is a movie about the world lying in evil. Monsters live in the forest, you can't escape them, and you definitely can't return to them. They cannot forgive Christopher Robin for growing up and leaving them, but he couldn't help but grow up, couldn't help but leave. It's a tragic, hopeless situation that inevitably escalates into a massacre. The second part goes further than the first in only one way: by revealing the origin of Winnie-the-Pooh and doing so, naturally, in an extremely stupid manner (like in 'Five Nights at Freddy's'), it still quite accurately conveys the overall feeling of hopelessness characteristic of decent horror films about lonely monsters.

Winnie-the-Pooh has become a junior comrade to Frankenstein, the Wolfman, Michael Myers, and other tragic figures who cannot help but kill, and whom it is impossible not to pity. Probably, that's how you say goodbye to childhood. With the sad realization that the present is not great, and it's better not to look too closely at a happy childhood. Just like with trash slashers.